My Gift to You in 2025: Forgiveness & Equanimity

Enlarged Territory Through Forgiveness. Spherical Peace Through Equanimity.

As we enter 2025, my gift to you is simple—yet life-altering:an expanded life through Forgiveness, and a peaceful soul through Equanimity.

This is not a cliché New Year’s wish. It is a spiritual offering born from my own journey—one filled with missed deadlines, unexpected delays, emotional growing pains, and divine lessons I didn’t ask for… but desperately needed.

The Art of Forgiveness: A Journey That Became My Teacher

Our book, The Art of Forgiveness, was originally scheduled for release on September 21, 2023. Then I was told Christmas… and I should have asked which year.

But today, finally, I am holding the formatted version in my hands. It looks like a book. It feels like a book. And I am moving forward with expectancy, gratitude, and spiritual maturity that I did not have when this journey began.

I thought I was writing a book.But the Creator quietly enrolled me in a PhD program on Equanimity at the University of Life.

And let me tell you… the coursework has been rigorous.

What Equanimity Really Is—and What It Is Not

Equanimity is the ability to stay grounded and emotionally steady—no matter what is happening around you.It means you respond with the same calm energy whether:

• you’re cleaning the garage,

• enjoying a nice dinner,

• or receiving a snide comment from someone who didn’t complete the job you paid them for.

Does that mean you smile at everything?Apparently… yes.

But equanimity is not apathy.Apathy is not caring.

And I care deeply about The Art of Forgiveness and the hearts waiting to be healed by its message. I care deeply about the people connected to my work and my purpose.

Equanimity does not require me to stop caring.It simply requires me to stop suffering unnecessarily.

My Mother’s Wisdom Still Guides Me

My mother, Hattie Lee, used to say:

“If you’re going to pray, don’t worry. If you’re going to worry, don’t pray.”

And of course, I’m over here praying, “Lord, help me not to worry, ”while clutching the serenity prayer like a lifeline:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Equanimity is the wisdom in that prayer.

It is the Peace that surpasses BREAKING NEWS, surprise bills, health scares, and even those people who text you something that really could have stayed in their draft folder.

My Equanimity Pop Quiz (That I Almost Failed)

Last week, I got a surprise test on my equanimity course.

I was leaving the Farmer’s Market in Gainesville when I heard an announcement that a blue Ford Flex was blocking someone in. I walked toward my car—my blue Ford Flex—only to discover the entire driver’s side had been keyed. Scratched up like a discount DVD.

A young man from across the parking area yelled for me to move my car. I said,“You keyed my car and I have the police on the phone.”

(He suddenly found enough space to drive away.)

When the officer arrived, he informed me that unless I saw the man keying my car, I had no proof. Then, as if the day wasn’t already testing my Peace, he described me as:

“A Black woman with dreads.”

Excuse me?

I had to correct him:“I don’t have dreads. I have Sisterlocks. The term ‘dread’ comes from a negative characterization of Rastafarians.”

He responded with a bonus insult:“Well… loc… weave… whatever.”

At this point, my equanimity was hanging by a thread.

I asked him, “Would your mother approve of you speaking to me like that?”

He asked again, annoyed, “Do you want a report or not?”

With a deep exhale, I realized:The last thing I needed was an altercation with someone carrying a gun.So I turned, opened my scratched door, and drove to the police station to file a report on my own terms.

Why Bother? Why Care?

Why should I care about scratches on my car?Why should I react to what someone calls my hair?

Because we all develop preferences:

• Don’t touch my things.

• Don’t disrespect me.

• Don’t destroy my property.

But preferences make us easy to trigger.

Society normalizes emotional reactivity.But Peace requires we reject it.

Equanimity is the muscle that keeps Peace from leaving our bodies.

How to Develop Equanimity: A Daily Practice

These practices strengthen your emotional immune system and expand your inner Peace.

1. Meditate.

Meditation teaches you that your thoughts are not the world—they’re only yours. Everything is neutral until you label it.

2. Stop emotions in their tracks.

Notice the feeling.Accept it.Release it.

3. Avoid judging.

Judgment creates emotional turbulence.Acceptance returns you to Peace.

4. Acceptance is not passivity.

Equanimity is calm action.You can handle difficult tasks without unnecessary drama.

5. Remove unnecessary drama from your life.

Your life is sacred.Guard access to your Peace.

6. Practice, practice, practice.

Stay peaceful while folding laundry, driving, answering emails, or dealing with rude people.Start small. Build resilience.

Everything becomes easier with practice.

Equanimity Gave Me the Gift of Perspective

Because I wasn’t emotionally attached to the outcome, I could be grateful:

• that my Flex had only $1,800 in damage

• that I wasn’t harmed

• that the officer’s words didn’t wound my spirit

I released the need to file a complaint and instead offered a prayer for him—because clearly, he needed one.

That is the power of equanimity.

My Gift to You in 2025

I pray you accept the gifts that saved me this year:

Forgiveness that enlarges your territory…Equanimity that stabilizes your Peace…And the strength to face life without surrendering your joy.

You deserve a 2025 filled with clarity, calm, and unshakable Peace.

And that begins with accepting the gift of equanimity.

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